BRENT
--------------
I'm so bored
Time to sheath the sword
Why is this game so damn adored?
Everyone says it's so much fun
12 hours in, I quit. Yeah, I'm done
I liked Zelda more before the 64
Hashtag
OcarinaOfTime
DAVE
---------------
STOP! Before you say something, you might regret!
(Brent: Hello Dave...)
Don't diss Ocarina on the internet!
(Brent: (laughs) Or what?)
Think what frightening fan boys you provoke!
They don't know you're otherwise a decent bloke!
BRENT
----------
Oh no! Ocarina minions
Look Dave, this is my opinion
DAVE
---------
After 12 hours?
Your opinion is conjecture
BRENT
-----------
Do I sense a rambling lecture?
DAVE
--------
Yes!
Hyrule was greater in our minds
Than a flat 2d plane
We longed for a game
to expand that old land that we loved
Secrets, and treasure
we could find in the corners and caves that we couldn't see back
when we squinted down from above
Run around wild and free! Dive into the sea!
Climb a tree and generally explore the flipping country!
(Brent: Yeah, maybe if i were six)
No no no no let me stop you there!
Maybe don't be a prick?
(Brent: Whoa whoa whoa who! Let me through the air!
Let's be calm and adult, I'm just not in the cult)
Play through the night, you'll see the light!
It's wonderful, so beautiful!
(Brent: "It blew your little socks off!" I get that but
You might see my view point if i could rebut-)
(Brent: *Continually grunts*)
Why don't feel the love that this game inspires, in thousands of lives 'round the world!
BRENT
----------
Here's what I'm getting at
the crappy textures make it all look so gross and flat
And why do those two guys run around like that?
And also there's this owl who will no shut up!
(Dave: Not one for reading then...)
This makes my eyeballs sore, 3D was done so well in Mario 64
Although it was released two whole years before
this clunky piece of crap you worship so much
DAVE
--------
But it is loved by all!
(Brent: Ha! Delusional!)
And it is wonderful!
(Brent: I just don't feel the magic)
You're all alone in this one, 'cause everyone's on board!
(Brent, at same time: It feels like everyone's on board except for me douche bag!)
BRENT
----------
They took my Hyrule
(Dave: Yeah! And made it greater!)
And made it look like stool!
(Dave: Ah! what is your deal!)
I don't know why it gives you such a bo*er
BOTH
--------
Cha Cha Cha
BRENT
----------
And you know what I hate?
DAVE
--------
Well, you know what I love?
ALTERNATING
---------------------
B: Aiming Shots
D: Breaking Pots
Just connect the dots in your brainy bank, you zany yank
B: Navi's Voice
D: Much more choice!
B: But i don't rejoice when my choices s**
You limey f**
D: *Scoff*
B: Menu screens
D: Magic Beans!
B: Which are dumb
D: No, they're not!
Zombie Screams
B: Haunt my dreams
D: But it's fun!
B: It's not fun!
D: Yes, it is!
B: No, it's not!
D: Yes, it is!
B: Is not
D: Is too
B: You're dumb!
D: Screw you!
B: Blow me!
D: No thanks!
B: Damn it, Shut up
B&D: Shut up!
B: You're the worst kind of fan boy
D: You're the missing Link to the Past!
B: It's dangerous to go alone, take this! (flips off Dave)
D: Wazzok!
B: a**hole!
D: Why don't you come and say that to my face!
B: Well, maybe i will!
D: Well, why don't you- where are you going?
BRENT
----------
Hey, smarty pants
Oh don't be shy
You wanna dance
Well, so do I!
Now here's your chance to tell me why
You love this game
DAVE
--------
Well, where to start, and what's the goal?
It's games as art that touch the soul
You have no heart, so how can you speak of love?
(Brent: That's bull crap! And you know it!)
AT THE SAME TIME
----------------------------
Dave: We needed this when 3d hadn't found it's way
so gamers can say this is how the future of games could be
To live inside that world, and explore the land, sought in hand
Be the hero that's what we all dreamed of
This is just nostalgia now!
You just weren't the proper age!
Nintendo Power scored it high! "It's pace was taut yet fun!"
A story that grips, without relying on some pre-rendered clips
It's a method that went on to eclipse all others to this day
Listen to the heart if you still know how
either way, this ends now!
Brent: Graphically, Ocarina was a tragedy
Do the textures cause depressive personality?
Cause they're literally sad to see
They took that game i loved so much,
and twisted it into a beast
and made it look all new and strange
If there's one thing i hate it's change
this overrated chore, with all its fan boy drones
what's worse, it spawned a 1,000,000 lame lame adventure clones
This is your nostalgia now
if you show it to a child today
they'll ask you for Link to the Past
it's much more fun to play
If you won't disavow,
This, your sacredest cow
I don't care, cause this ends now!
BRENT
----------
Man, this was an unnecessarily elaborate argument
DAVE
--------
You could say that, yes
But then you could have said a lot if I had just listened
BRENT
----------
I cant believe we even fought over this I mean we're both Zelda fans, right?
DAVE
--------
Totally! Even if it is
BOTH
--------
In slightly different ways
BRENT
----------
I mean who says all the games you love have to hold up well?
DAVE
--------
Yeah, and why should you like anything that happened
after you turn 9?
BRENT
----------
Right, and it's fine if you love things because
everybody else does
DAVE
--------
Indeed! And far be it from me to tell you exactly
where you can shove-
BOTH
--------
Stop before you say something you might regret!
Why are we always fighting on the internet?
Fandom starts with love, there's no need to shove
D: Surely we can
B: Disagree and
Both: Still both be fans of stuff
We're here for fun and games
Let friendship quench those flame wars
AT THE SAME TIME
----------------------------
Dave: So you're wrong, so what?
we'll get along, whatever you think
Brent: And even though your wrong I know
we'll still be friends whatever you think
BOTH
--------
About Ocarina of Time
Ocarina of Time!
AT THE SAME TIME
---------------------
Dave: Was Great
Brent: s**s