Another day of puzzles and human hunting Lying in wait and wanting simply one chance Another day of looking cool in my cape And generally being great and wearing no pants I look for humans all day long Then I take a little spaghetti break and back to the grind I keep maintaining all of my brilliant puzzles Hold your skull tight because they'll blow your dang mind! And yet in spite of all of my dedication Sans, you're as lazy and dim as a cow Get off your bones! Your puzzles need calibration What if a human were lurking near us now? Sorry, I was just staring at this lamp Uh-huh It's really cool Uh-huh Do you wanna look? No, you skeletal scallywag! I don't have time for that What if a human comes through here? We must be watchful, on our toes, eagle-eyed If humans should happen by, we won't let them go My puzzles rule! And also this junior jumble How do I stay so humble? I do not know And look at this one! Blades will slice, spikes will swing This puzzle has everything, it gives me such glee! Sooner or later, humans will come again And someone will capture them and it will be me! And on that day, you all will say "Hail Papyrus" I'll finally get all the things I deserve First off respect, then reverence and recognition It will be me all the little people serve!
Undyne and Asgore they'll say "Well done, Papyrus! You've toiled well, toiled long, toiled hard" I'll bathe in kisses all day and all night They'll promote me to the head of the royal guard Hmm, maybe this lamp will help you Sans! You are not helping, you lazybones All you do is sit and boondoggle! Hey, take it easy I've gotten a ton of work done today A skele-ton Sans! Come on, you're smiling I am and I hate it! Take your stupid human-shaped lamp and get back to work You get back to work I will! Back to our day of tracking evasive humans They won't escape our two-man skeleton crew Another day preparing for deadly battle Honing a tactic that'll turn their hearts blue I will attend to my puzzles As for your work? Put a little more backbone into it! And one day soon, my puzzles will catch a human Then maybe someone will want to be friends And all my woes will come to an end I'll be the captain of the guard They'll hold me in such high regard The praise will be prodigious And I'll be so prestigious So popular and powerful The path I walk so flowerful That all the fairest monster drones Will line the block to jump my bones And someone Will want To be my friend! I'll catch a human, join the guard And finally have a friend! (Hey!) Heh