Viv : Some folk like to call it friggin' Fornicatin', jig-a-jiggin', Hide the sausage, slap-and-tickle or a lay, Shaftin', shaggin', screwin', humpin', Rumpy-pumpy, pumpy-pumpin', Bangin', bonkin', rogerin' your end away. But I call it A beautiful mem'ry The deed of joy A s**ual happening Bodies touching, got no clothes on That nice tingle, skin together Viv/Young Viv : No more kid's stuff, it's the real thing Young Viv : Now the world looks very different It's a place of s**ual happenings Just waiting out there for me I can cha-cha, I can rhumba Now at last I've got your number 'Cos I'm thinking just the same as you Doing the dance of love Once I felt like Cinderella Now I'd polka any fella Any fella that I bump into Doing the dance of love Doing the dance Doing the dance Doing the Doing Doin' the dance ev'rybody does Doin' the dance Doing the dance Doing the Doing it Doing Doin' the dance, the dance of love There's a million men in Leeds And some are flowers, some are weeds But the whole damn blooming shipment Has the necess'ry equipment That can satisfy my needs Wanna tell the whole damn street Now that I've lost it, I'm complete
I don't know about the tango But it sure takes two to bang-o! Come and dance me off Me feet I'm doing the dance Doing the dance Doing the Doing Doin' the dance ev'rybody does Doin' the dance Doing the dance Doing the Doing it Doing Doin' the dance, the dance of love Good-day complete total stranger What would you be like in bed? What would you look like Stark-bollock naked? These are the questions that pop in my head D'you know, complete total stranger, I watched you when you walked by I like a nice bottom And fellas that's got 'em And you qualify Complete total stranger I'm doing the dance Doing the dance I'm doing the Doing it Doing Doin' the dance ev'rybody does Doin' the dance Doing the dance Doing the Doing it Doing Doin' the dance Doing it Doing Doin' the dance Doing it Doing Doin' the dance, the dance of love Viv : Second time were disappointing Not exciting, like the first time His report read "must try harder" Young Viv : Where's the romance? Matt : That were nice love. Young Viv : There'll be other s**ual happenings But I won't be seeing him again Viv : famous last words!