You may long for love
You musn't all despair
For there's a secret you should know
To capture the hearts of the fair
You may not have the looks
You may not have the dash
But you win yourself a girl, if you've only got a moustache
A moustache, a moustache, if you've only got a moustache!
You may be common folk
Without a hint of pride
But you needn't be a king
To make any maiden the bride
You may not have the name
You may not have the cash
But you'll make that girl your own
If you've only got a moustache
A moustache, a moustache, if you've only got a moustache
You may be big and fat
Or uglier than sin
All the ladies shut you out
You wonderin' how to get in
Well here is my advice
For how to make a splash
You can have your pick of girls
If you've only got a moustache
A moustache, a moustache, if you've only got a moustache
A moustache, a moustache, a moustache
Big moustache, thick moustache
My moustache, your moustache
Say the word the word moustache
A moustache, a moustache
Now we both have said moustache
A moustache, a moustache
If you've only got a moustache!