[Intro: Sample of Santa's Super Sleigh]
Look who's coming 'round the bend
It's Santa and his reindeer friends
[Verse 1: Da Phat Controlla]
I be that festive motherf**a, North Pole's what I'm reppin'
Tell my elves quit the b**hing, we gon' make sh** in a second
Teenagers disrespect me, f** their sh** I'm hectic
You get jack sh** if you're naughty, I ain't coming to no poor kids
Sleigh's so impressive, moving at a quick pace
For all the rich kids, and then especially for Kevin
Then Evan, after eleven, I gets you the presents
Red suits, black boots usually what I'm dressed in
For mum's c*nts buckle up, I come in your direction
In your house, between b**bies up, on my erection
Decorate the front lawn, or your house ain't getting nothing
If you expect a present, leave cookies on the dressing
[Hook:]
You better bet I know, b**hes be getting coal
On Christmas Day I be like ho ho (ho) x 2
(Clop clop clop clop, Merry Christmas boy)
(Clop clop clop clop, here you get a toy)
(Clop clop clop clop, I don't want no soy)
On Christmas Day I be like ho ho (ho)
[Verse 2:]
Ho ho ho
Your momma thinks I'm hot, man I asked "Is he asleep?"
Then we gon' smoke a lot, right back up the chimney
Pull up on the rooftop, but I don't have any keys
Even though yo house got locks, I come down the chimney
Yeah yeah I see, I'm feeling right on these double D's
That's for me? Heh thanks, but I do this sh** for free
As soon as I leave, yeah I can finally breathe
That wasn't best yeah, but it's fun for Christmas Eve
It hails, can't fail; the game: X-mas
Escorts, Newport, This here be my life still
So mami tell how my dick feels
Next year we play that Vick feel, for now just chill
[Hook]
[Spoken Outro:]
Yeah, thanks for listening
Have a Merry Christmas everyone
And uh, I don't really f** all yo mommas
Or... maybe I do
What's her... what's her name again?
I mean... I don't know if I'd really remember, but
There's a chance I might have, so
Just take that into consideration
And I hope you're not that mad about it
But anyway, um yeah, bye
Til next time, and next year