Amateur Transplants - Finals Fantasy lyrics

Everybody tells me I'll pa** easily I've been working hard for oh so long But they don't realise my exam technique Guarantee's that something will go wrong I can name you 40 types of hernia I know the innovation of the spleen I know the incidence of pemphigus I even know what cohort studies mean I know the cytokines in carcinoid I read ultrasounds and MRI I can draw the structure of Rifampicin And I can stage a cancer of the eye I answered all the written papers easily But the clinicals won't be so fine I get so nervous I just cant perform OK, come in candidate 6079, tell me What do you see? (I don't know) Look at his knee (I don't know) What does this scar mean? (I really don't know) Is it Paget's? (No) Baget's? (No, that doesn't exist) (I thought not (What the hell did you say Baget's for?) I knew this so well! All my knowledge seems to have deserted me Let me give you this- What do you see? This is an X-ray showing Crohn's disease No it's not, it's called an ECG Tell me when you'd might require a central line If you have to get to Marble Arch What would you find in Normal Saline? Silicon, and Caesium and Starch What is MS? (I don't know) What's an MI? (I don't know) How would you treat one? (Oh this one I know!) I'd make a small incision in the front of his nose (NO!) I'm sorry (What the bloody hell is wrong with you?!) I knew this so well! I'd like you to test this lady's reflexes Why's that tendon hammer in her mouth? I'm trying to a**ess her gag reflex I meant that you should use it further south (NOT THERE!) Tell me how you'd manage an emergency I do ABC (Good!) A is for Air B is for Bleeding C is for Cyclizine Right I think we'd better end it there How did I do? (I can't say) Did I do well? (Go away!) But have I pa**ed It? (It pains me to say) You're white and posh and male so we can't let you fail (Hallelujah, Rule Britannia) Though you're dangerous I knew this full well!