Alphacat - Barack Obama vs Mitt Romney lyrics

EPIC RAP BATTLES OF HISTORY! MITT ROMNEY! VS! BARACK OBAMA! BEGIN! [Mitt Romney] I'm not gonna let this battle be dictated by facts I'm rich, I got fat stacks and Super PACs We all know what went down in that 2008 election You're a decent politician with a winning complexion You're all Barack and no bite Been no change and we're all still hoping That you'll shut your mouth But like Guantanamo Bay they're both open You're from the windy city Where you're looking pretty with your blowhards But come January, you'll be left evicted and with no job Raw rhymes stronger than my jaw line when I spit a phrase Knocking you harder than front doors in my old mission days You see this silver spoon? This dug Ma** out of debt Took you four years to drop unemployment down below 8% You feel that Barry? You're old news, everyone's having doubts And your rhymes are as weak as this economy that you've done nothing about Call me a vicious businessman cause Romney's stealing this race I'll go Bain Capital on your donkey a**, restructure your face [Barack Obama] They say your father was a great man, you must be what's left Need to stop hatin' on gays, let 'em teach you how to dress You've got the momma jeans, and a Mister Fantastic face So rich and white it's like I'm running against a cheesecake! Republicans need a puppet and you fit Got their hands so far up your rear, call you Mitt I'm the head of state, you're like a head of cabbage 'Bout to get smacked by my stimulus package You're a bad man with no chance, you can't even touch me I got four more years (two termz!) in the White House, just trust me I hoped you saved your best rhymes for the second half Cause right now, I'm 47% through kicking your a** [Mitt Romney] Whatever, that 40% thing got you real mad What, did it remind you how many decent parents you had? [Barack Obama] Uh, look, I respect all religions, uh, but it might get crazy If the White House has a first, second, and a third lady! [Mitt Romney] Ha, don't bring up wives, man, what are you doing? You got hitched to the female version of Patrick Ewing! [Barack Obama] Uh, let me be clear, uh, don't get it twisted We'll see how pretty your face is after my fist has kissed it [Mitt Romney] Ahhuuhhhaa You're a stuttering communist [Barack Obama] Oh yeah? Well you're stupid [Mitt Romney] You're stupid [Barack Obama] Nuh-uh [Mitt Romney] Errggg [Barack Obama] Errggg [Eagle] Cawwww! [Abraham Lincoln] By the power invested in me by this giant bald bird The President shall not be the shiniest of two turds! You! I wanna like you! Don't talk about change, just do it! I fought for what was on my brain until a bullet went through it! And you, moneybags, you're a pancake, you're flip-floppity It's a country, not a company you can play like Monopoly! I'll properly reach across the aisle and b**h-smack you as equals! "Of the people, by the people, for the people" Eagle! WHO WON? WHO'S NEXT? YOU DECIDE! EPIC (Cawwww!) RAP BATTLES OF HISTORY!