Afroman - Drive Better Drunk lyrics

[Chorus: 2x] Don't grab my keys when the party's over I drive better drunk, than you do sober [Verse 1] I don't know what you've been told I've been drinkin since 12 years old Started in 1988 Hangin at the liquor store real real late I drunk a swallow, I drunk a cup Drunk the bottle, I threw up Over the years, I learned to pace it Get kinda tipsy, but not that wasted I like beer, but I love malt liquor Cuz malt liquor, get me drunk quicker Stop on the freeway, take a whiz Hop in my Cadillac and handle my biz I drive better drunk than I do sober Cuz when I'm sober right I think I can make through the, red light Go, go, go, I hope I'm not dead right But when I'm drunk, I know I can't So I ain't, I drive like a saint Drinkin is a cla** I did not flunk I'm a Colt 45 certified drunk [Chorus: 2x] [Verse 2] I dropped outta school in 9-0 Became the world's greatest wino I drink at home, I drink at work Ignore the boss, he just a jerk I drink 12:00 in the day Relax my nerve, serve my yay' When my day go bad, I always drink Calm down, relax and think Only days we like to clown A 24-ounce 'fore the sun go down On weekends, that's when it's cool To drink a 40-ounce, and act a fool Once I get into that zone I leave that beer and that liquor alone I can barely walk, I can barely talk But I can glide that Cadillac like a hawk [Chorus: 2x] [Verse 3] I ran from the cops in the rain With my church shoes on I drove from Palmdale, California to Compton Drunk two 40-ounces, Old English 800, the club ended All the homies left my in the parkin lot toe' back Wasn't nobody out there but me and the sheriff department Fell asleep on the 14 Woke up on the 405 Fell asleep on the 405 Woke up on the 105 Fell asleep on the 105 Woke up in bed Call that, uh, autopilot But don't try that at home; I got sk**s I am to liquor, what the Crocodile Hunter is to alligators "These crocs, they're not your ordinary crocs "You gotta grab them in the mandible" We can't find no hotels man (you know what I'm sayin) So we might have to drive All day, and all night I got some music So it's alright [Repeat 4x] All day, and all night I got some music It's alright Make you feel good Rollin through the hood With your windows down Checkin out your sounds Just lend me a light No stress and strive, baby