Abie Rotenberg - The Atheist Convention lyrics

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Abie Rotenberg - The Atheist Convention lyrics

The plane took off on schedule from La Guardia On a bright clear sunny summers day What a cheerful trio they appeared to be They were off the ground… westward bound to the atheist convention m L.A. Peter was a lawyer from Manhattan Mohammed sold used cars in Sheepshead Bay And Howard practiced dentistry in Woodmere With the clouds below …they were on the go to the atheist convention in L.A. "I'm so glad that we'll be staying at the Hilton I can't wait to spend a day In Disneyland Did you hear this year they're letting in agnostics The convention should be absolutely grand There'll be speeches that will ponder our existence Religious dogma will come under fierce attack That we all once were primates is our motto And that big bang's not a theory but a fact" Peter ordered white wine with his dinner Howard and Mohammed asked for gin There was a chosid in the next row eating kosher "Could he be so naive.. to still believe that someone up there's watchin' over him?" Suddenly there was a big explosion Everyone began to scream and wail The plane was in a spin and losing altitude Pete cried "Mercy Father".. Mohammed, "Spare me Allah" And in hebrew Howard said "Shma Yisroel"... "I'm so glad that we'll be staying at the Hilton I can't wait to spend a day In Disneyland Did you hear this year they're letting in agnostics The convention should be absolutely grand There'll be speeches that will ponder our existence Religious dogma will come under fierce attack That we all once were primates is our motto And that big bang's not a theory but a fact" Just before that final awful impact While everyone was sure that they would die Somehow, somewhy the engines came to life again And a few yards from the trees, with what seemed to be great ease The pilot flew die plane back to the sky Everyone gave thanks to G-d in heaven It was a miracle that saved us on this day The chossid turned and asked the trio with a smile With your true colors showing, will you 3 still be going To the atheist convention in L. A. (Musical of chorus) Peter's now a priest in Cincinnati Mohammed built a mosque in Santa Fe And Howard's still a dentist out in Woodmere But now they call him Chaim'l and on Shabbos wears a shtreimel ‘Cuz their buried faith ignited, while flying on "United" To the atheist convention in L.A.